Miles is very intrigued by the keyboard and may just help me write this blog. Or he may just keep pulling my hands away from the keyboard. We shall see. *note: Miles typed a little, mostly spacebar, and then started crying so this post was fragmented for a time. I have since edited it prior to publishing it.
There are so many things that I learn every day. I remember when my grandfather used to ask me, "What did you learn today?" every time I came home from school. There were times when I would say, "Nothing," and times that I would actually tell him something I learned. No matter how I responded he would smile at me in a way that I will always remember. I find myself looking for lessons often. I know Miles is teaching me about myself, love, commitment, parenting, and growth. I hope to pay attention to these lessons and even document some of them. This will pay homage to my grandfather who taught me the value of continually learning, and may even prove valuable to myself or others in the future.
These are some of the lessons Miles has taught me so far:
It's all worth it.
It's hard to be a parent.
It's okay to be sad and frustrated.
It's okay to ask for help.
The ablity to make Miles laugh is one of the most awesome gifts of being a parent.
Material things are of little value.
I love being his mom, and I love how being a mom strengthens every other part of my character.
Sleep is precious.
I can survive and function on very little food and sleep; becoming a mom has made me a better person.
Even when Miles is crying if I have to go I have to go.
Miles recently learned to pass things from one hand to the other, to grab his toes, to suck on his thumb without trying to fit his whole fist in his mouth, to sleep through the night, to laugh when mommy laughs, that the hiccups are not the end of the world, that it is awesome when daddy reads "Oh My Oh My Oh Dinosaurs," that it is awesome when mommy reads "Snuggle Puppy," and that it is awesome when anyone reads "Hello Bee, Hello Me" (especially if they include sound effects).
Being a mom makes me miss my mom. Every day that Miles does something new I want to call her. Every day that I feel worn out and think about how she took care of 6 of us I miss her. I wish I had thanked her more, and I wish I remembered more of her wisdom. Nothing can replace that loss, and I don't want anyone or anything to try.
I learn best by experiencing. Someone can tell me "Step 1 do this..." and I will know that but not always learn that or understand it until I experience it. I'll write more on this in another post. For now Miles is ready to eat and hopefully have another night of sleeping through.